Seeking Help

A couple of days ago, I got a call from a close friend. We hadn't spoken for some time and it was nice to hear from her. After the usual pleasantries, she blurts out with a giggle, "Guess what? I'm seeing a therapist!" I said, "Congratulations!" She was surprised by my response. She asked me why I would congratulate her as most others would probably find it unsettling. I told her that it was a really healthy move and affirmed her decision. Most people have a hard time admitting even to themselves that they need help. And really, all of us do. Seeking counselling requires a lot of humility, honesty and courage. I believe that taking the initiative to approach someone for help is the first step in dealing with our issues and healing.

I'm not saying we should all grab the phone book and make an appointment with the first psychologist we can find. It is very important to be careful in choosing from whom we seek help or advise because we can end up more messed up than when we first started. God knows that I know this from experience. Someone I cared about ended up worse in the hands of an extremely irresponsible and egotistical psychiatrist, who turned out to be just as sick. They developed an emotionally dependent and destructive bond, which just served to exacerbate their problems. They both are now still picking up the pieces of their fractured lives and trying to move on.

A good friend who exhibits a lot of wisdom and is willing to listen can sometimes help just as much in making us process or work out our thoughts and feelings. Of course, if the issues are really deep and complex, then it's better to consult a trained professional.

Burying our head in the sand and pretending there are no problems does not make the problem go away. Issues that remain buried can fester and seep through. It will eventually manifest itself and hurt your relationships in a more devastating manner.

This friend of mine has it all, a hugely successful career, wealth and a loving family. Despite all of that, she felt she was still missing something so she sought help for her inner unrest. Kudos to her for doing that!

I did remind her though that in her quest to meet her emotional, physical and material needs, she might have forgotten the spiritual one. It might actually just be a matter of attending to that need that has been long neglected and sacrificed, in the pursuit of the others. You see, I believe that man is body, soul and spirit, and all three need nourishment...but that's another story.