Showing Gratitude

Whether we admit it or not, the people that we most take for granted are usually the ones who have given to us freely and without measure.

It has weighed on my mind lately because I keep seeing individuals who are in need of help not even ask nicely, but instead expect it - and if they don't receive it, actually demand it. People have extended their hands to them all their lives that they now think of it as a right, and no longer a privilege. They feel a false sense of entitlement, simply because people who love them have met their needs without them having to ask. They even forget to show appreciation after they get what they want.

Consequently, no matter how much they are loved, that kind of behavior never fails to cause that well of love and generosity to start to go dry. There's no faster "drying agent" than ingratitude.

We are all guilty of ingratitude. From the people who try to live solely on welfare or government assistance, to the help given by our extended and immediate family, and finally to the guidance, provision and love of God.

Sadly, for most of us, the only time the cold reality of our callousness and ingratitude will only dawn on us, is when we lose that supply of love and generosity that we have so depended on but sorely taken for granted. That is the only time we realize how much our loved ones and others have enriched our lives.

So before that happens, we should practice some humility and show our appreciation. Try to remember the very basic lesson that hopefully all our parents have taught us. Say "please" when we need or want something that we cannot do for ourselves, and "thank you" when it is given or offered to us. Two simple but powerful phrases. Be reminded that people owe us nothing. Whatever they do for us, they do out of kindness and sometimes just unconditional love. Let us try not to abuse it, but to respect and reciprocate it.

Pissing Matches

I've come across a few people who love to have pissing matches. A fierce need (a.k.a. insecurity) to display their supposed mental prowess probably drives them to always show off their acquired knowledge. They will argue points that you're not arguing with them about, and they will play devil's advocate to any issue discussed disregarding whatever personal experience you have had about the subject matter. They want to convince you that your experience was somehow faulty, or just plain imagined - because really now, they know better.

I get tired listening to such people. That's why when I hear them starting again, I shift my attention to something or someone else and leave them to the other conversation participants (a.k.a victims). I consider them conversation perverts - those who like people to watch or listen to them while they do mental and verbal masturbation as the pleasure in the discourse is theirs alone.

Pissing matches really solve nothing because in the end - no matter who pisses higher, all you have is a whole lot of piss.

Can you tell that I am royally pissed? :)

Waxing Nostalgic

I was in the kitchen cooking when I heard this very familiar song blaring from Hubby's hobby room. Memories came unbidden and brought me back to the younger, crazier, carefree days of my life. He apparently stumbled upon it online while researching on Tagalog. It just so happened that it was a cut from one of Gary Valenciano's concerts of years ago when I toured with him as back up and guest singer. I started singing, dancing - basically going wild. Hubby was quite entertained, but still a bit puzzled. In between verses of singing, I managed to spit out that I was part of that live recording of the concert, that at some points, one of the voices that he was hearing was mine.

Before he could express more of his surprise, I went to look for the CDs of the concert. Now, here I am in my room with that concert blasting along with the recorded screaming of the Araneta Coliseum audience in my ear, recapturing the goosebumps that would envelop us onstage before when 30,000 people started screaming, dancing and stomping their feet during a concert.

It seems like another person's life when I look back. Now I'm here, in a totally different world, working in banking and finance, devoid of anything that colored my life back then. It's during times like this when I get quite homesick and miss everything I had going on back then in Manila.

I'm not ungrateful for what I have right now, not at all. God has given me a chance to explore other worlds and allowed me to flourish in it. Here, I have had the chance to discover and hone talents other than those in the arts. I have found another kind of satisfaction in what I do now, albeit different.

So here I sit, hoping that somewhere in this nostalgic moment, I find some inspiration to write two promised articles. But the way my mind gone off into memory lane, I don't think I'll have much progress tonight.

Boy, Girl, Bakla, Tomboy

Check out Pride & Prejudice, PINOYexpats’ latest edition tackling homosexuality. Tin did an excellent job in leading this issue. Meet our Pinoy brothers and sisters who share their deepest feelings about their orientation and lifestyle. Don’t miss this very poignant issue.

Le Tour Cliché - Conclusion

Chugging through the Rhine Riverbanks

As we were sitting on our last day of train travel in Europe, I was disappointed to learn that the train we were taking back to Cologne en route to Belgium was not the express one. However, the disappointment slowly dissipated as we chugged through small, sleepy towns along the Rhine River. On the opposite bank, we saw different quaint little hamlets with their respective church steeples, and the occasional old castle overlooking it. At one point, a train was going through one on the other side, in the opposite direction we were going. It brought to mind those little play towns sold during Christmas as holiday scenes that come with lights, which are set up as part of the Christmas décor. As I took in the very scenic ride, I couldn’t help but look back at the last two weeks that we had just spent. Traveling may have cost us a fair bundle, but one just can’t put a price on that kind of time spent with a loved one. I know I almost sound like a MasterCard commercial, but there’s really nothing like shared experiences to further build friendships and relationships.

Wanderlust

Our last day was supposed to have been spent resting and recouping from the hectic trip. Our wanderlust though, wouldn’t let us sit still. We found ourselves walking to the station to buy a ticket to the Belgian coast of Ostend. There, we had a relaxing time by the seaside, walking, people-watching, eating and drinking in the sights. We treated ourselves to a mouth-watering lunch by the shore, capped with Kassis and of course, to a last serving of authentic Belgian waffles for dessert. I expected a normal size waffle but I was served one the size of a huge plate. When I expressed surprise at the size, the woman happily chimed, “Big waffle for a big woman!” LOL! She meant well I think, but it made me think even more that my pant-ripping episode was indeed due to the increasing size of my derrière. Then and there, I resolved to go on a diet the minute I set foot in the US. What a highlight that was of my last touring day in Europe!

Au revoir

The next day, we bid Europe goodbye as our Belgian host, Marina dropped us off at the airport. I was relieved that we made it through 15 days of traveling without any incidents. As it happened, not long after we arrived at the airport, Hubby looked at me with his baby browns and nervously whispered, “Er…Hunni, I don’t have my wallet.” Our minds were awhirl with all the phone calls we needed to make and things we needed to do if the wallet was lost or stolen. We simmered for an hour before a call to Marina was made as she was only getting home and could only confirm then that Hubby indeed left his wallet under the bed. It didn’t end there. Our flight to London was delayed so when we arrived in Heathrow, we literally ran from one gate to another to make our connection to Boston. There went my plans to go shopping at Heathrow’s Duty Free shop! And despite reassurances from the ground stewardess that our luggage made the plane as we did, it arrived two nights later after we did.

A less than ideal ending to an almost perfect vacation, but we really couldn't complain. Better that those things happened then than at any other time during our trip. Besides, these little incidents seem to just add character to any event in life when one's looking back. This vacation has given us more beautiful and funny memories to tuck away in our hearts.