Friday, August 13, 2004

How Truthful Are We?

Truth.

It's a short word but apparently one of the hardest to understand. I see people assert things which I know are untrue without batting an eyelash. It has weighed heavily on my mind lately.

What is truth?

The lexicon meaning of it is:

1 a archaic : FIDELITY, CONSTANCY b : sincerity in action, character, and utterance
2 a (1) : the state of being the case : FACT (2) : the body of real things, events, and facts : ACTUALITY (3) often capitalized : a transcendent fundamental or spiritual reality b : a judgment, proposition, or idea that is true or accepted as true c : the body of true statements and propositions
3 a : the property (as of a statement) of being in accord with fact or reality b chiefly British : TRUE 2 c : fidelity to an original or to a standard

On the other hand, among the many actual "kinds" of truth that abound these days are:

Embellished Truth - The braggart's favorite tool
The truth is stretched a bit further and exaggerated in order to impress or glorify one's self.

Half Truth - The manipulator's handy device
When only a portion of the truth is given and the rest of the information left out so as to affect a perception or an outcome of a situation. Usually used when one wants to manipulate a circumstance or state of affairs. Any other kind of "un-fact" that is riddled with some truth, so one can still say that what was said was true. The other one is the "white lie" supposedly done primarily to spare the feelings of people.

Twisted Truth - The fanatic's desperate grip on their sanity (also the Policitian's way to get elected)
When feelings dictate a person's perception of reality, so the truth is twisted to fit someone's convenience. I guess one example is a parent's unwavering perception of how their child is no matter if proven otherwise.

Most of the time it isn't flagrant, but extremely subtle. I'm sure we can all quickly come up with the times we used any, or all of the three. Unless we lie even to ourselves and say that we are never untruthful. :) If we actually believe that, then we are in dire need of therapy for delusion.

Truth contaminated with anything else is, in fact, A LIE. So yes, everytime we state anything else but the simple, bald fact, we are lying. That is the hard truth.

What makes people lie? I believe it is fear. I know that the times I have lied, it was because I was scared about something. In the end though, I always regret not being truthful because I know that things usually turn out in the best, not necessarily easy, way if the truth is all laid out in the open. Besides, it has its way of catching up and that's something I would rather not have to deal with.

What is the purpose of truth? I recall two sayings. One is, "the truth hurts," and the other is, "the truth will set you free". So yes it hurts, but it sets you free. It sets us free from pretensions and lies, and the many problems that arise from it. Truth is often very hard to accept or deal with, thus you find that the people that face it, are often the most courageous.

Deep inside, we all know when we're being totally truthful or not. At least I hope so. Even if we cannot admit to lying in front of people, I hope that we can, at the very least, admit it to ourselves. Unless we lie so much that we actually start to believe that our utterances are true. What a scary thought. I hope we all learn to handle our lies before it starts to handle us.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have thought about the truth in the past and I came up with my own definition.

My definition of the truth is "the good word". Not in a biblical sense, but "the truth" are words that make someone feel good to be alive. "the truth" motivates me to be a better person.

By my definition of the truth, a person speaking the truth can be wrong with their facts, as long as their heart is in the right place. If they are trying to pick someone up off their feet or heal some emotional wounds, then they are speaking the truth. It's not the facts that matter when someone speaks the truth, it's the love and emotion that the person feels toward the recipient that is important.

So does that mean you can cheat on your companion or swindle money from your parents while speaking the truth at the sametime? Of course not. If you are cheating or stealing, you didn't have the best intentions for them in the first place and were never in the position to speak the truth. No matter what you say to them, if you are cheating or stealing you are not speaking the truth.

But if someone is reaching out to me and giving me words from their heart---those are truthful words. Even if the events or facts he or she says aren't correct, they sure wish the words were true because it would make my life better in some way.

Do I like being lied to? Of course not, no one does. But I'm not going to spend my time and energy pointing out lies. I usually know what's really going on, I also know they love me. Usually, I know why they said what they said. There's no reason to cause friction.

The people who speak the truth are the people who really love me. Even if I know they are wrong I listen because I know they care. It's real hard to do sometimes, but it's better than walking around being pissed off because I know someone lied to me.

Another thing...there's this saying my mom told me when I was growing up, "You can learn more by listening to what was not said than what was said". Listen to what they are not saying--that is the truth.

Anonymous said...

By the way, Dan wrote the comment above.

Writing all that stuff above was my long winded way of telling you things are all good. The people in your life love you and that's super important...that includes the people who read your blog.

Dude, you're right though: People are total liars sometimes! Don't let it get to you though, you have too many cool thoughts and experiences to post on this blog.