In the past six years, I have had these "words to live by" posted by my desk. It was given to me by my boss then. I witnessed him continually apply everything that is written in these two laminated cards - the written and the living example before my very eyes for the three years I worked with him. He taught me a lot of things that I cannot even quantify, but if these were all that he taught and showed me, I already would have learned plenty from him. In the light of how I see people relate to each other every day, I thought it was important to share.
Hope you can get as much use of it as I have.
STOP, LOOK, LISTEN, AND ACT
Stop talking, stop thinking, stop doing, just stop. Take a really deep breath. Now take another one.
Look inside. What are you feeling and why? Tell yourself the truth. Remind yourself that you're great and learning all the time.
Listen to yourself. Ask your heart-mind, "What do I really want to accomplish right now?" "Is this the best way?"
Do the behavior that is right for this situation.
A reaction is when we respond to a situation based solely on our past experiences. They are unconscious. Reactions - bad or good, have certain consequences. They prevent us from achieving our present-day goals and our future vision.
Personal responsibility is the understanding that we are the source of our experience and results. It is the ability to choose behavior in every situation. Without being responsible, our behaviors result from being on "automatic pilot" living from patterns formed from past experiences.
Share your experience of a person or a situation relative to the results produced. Present it in the neutral way with nothing added or withheld. Do your best not to analyze.
Welcome everything, no matter how you feel. Don't defend, justify, or explain. If you are uncertain about what is being said, ask questions to ensure your understanding.
Simple enough to read but tough to follow but reminding ourselves these things at key moments in life will make a world of difference in our relationships and our future.