Hubby and I have had a very draining week. FIL, who suffers from cancer, developed an infection and we had to rush him to the hospital. We got there at 10:30 pm and did not get out of there until 1 pm the next day, having spent the night at the emergency room and getting him admitted to a room. We spent the rest of the week going after work, every evening to visit and also bring food to MIL, as well as to my SIL, who was visiting from Florida at that time with her two daughters. They spent their days in the hospital. My two other SILs, who are his usual caretakers, were taking a much needed vacation when it happened. It was good for them to have a break, as well as give us a chance to be able to contribute a bit more of our time to FIL's care. They tried not to worry too much as we took over, and we just kept them updated on his condition.
After four days in the hospital, FIL showed improvement and was able to speak more, eat and sit up again. So yesterday, he was discharged and he is now back home with my SILs who have returned from their short vacation. We all breathed a sigh of relief as yet one more health hiccup is overcome.
It is so hard to see a loved one in pain. Although there is something uplifting, however sad, about seeing love in action when you witness individuals being strong and brave, and doing everything they can to ease the suffering of their loved one.
Monday, August 22, 2005
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
What Would You Do?
If you win the lottery, what would you do? This was a discussion that Hubby and I had once. This article made me think on it more.
Me? I would keep my mouth shut. There are already enough people in the world who try to get you to spend your money on them in one way or another. Whether your earnings are little, some or a lot, there are those that just do not value the amount of hard work you do to earn your money. People sometimes take on an attitude that it is their right to have you spend on them because, really, they need it more than you do! Imagine if they find out that you have a windfall? The more they will feel entitled to it. Whatever assistance you try to extend, will probably be never enough anyway. It is amazing how ungrateful the people you continually help become. That’s why I always try to keep in check my impulses on generosity. It is not because I’m very greedy or unwilling to share. I already do my little bit of helping here and there, and just might increase a little bit more if I had more to give. I believe that helping too much is not good either. Aside from taking your constant help for granted, there are lessons that the person you are helping might miss if they don't go through their struggle.
I am reminded of that story when someone, out of kindness, “helped” a new-born butterfly break out of its cocoon by slicing it open. The butterfly came out with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It was never able to fly. It is the struggle out of the cocoon that actually helps it to strengthen its body and allows it to spread its wings and fly. The same goes for us. I believe there’s a valuable lesson wrapped in every hardship that we go through. It’s up to us to either be bitter about it or to meet it head-on and learn as much as we can from it. If someone takes it away, we will never learn the lesson. Trials enrich our souls far better than money can enrich us financially. Nothing hones character more than adversity.
So we would do good to be wise in how we offer “help”. Yes, it's nice to get the credit and the accolade of being known as helpful and generous. I think it can become selfish because what we sometimes do is not really helping, just enabling. Enabling in a way that people remain in their stunted state, while we glory and pat ourselves in the back for being a kind and magnanimous human being.
I think God, in His infinite wisdom, has not allowed me to win the lottery. Well, it doesn’t help that I don’t really buy tickets! But if I ever do, people in really dire straits or in life and death situations will probably get help... as anonymously as I possibly could give it. That way they can put their faith in God and how He works through people, not in people or money. I don't think I will let anyone around me ever know of my windfall, save for Hubby. I think it's just much better that way, don't you think?
Me? I would keep my mouth shut. There are already enough people in the world who try to get you to spend your money on them in one way or another. Whether your earnings are little, some or a lot, there are those that just do not value the amount of hard work you do to earn your money. People sometimes take on an attitude that it is their right to have you spend on them because, really, they need it more than you do! Imagine if they find out that you have a windfall? The more they will feel entitled to it. Whatever assistance you try to extend, will probably be never enough anyway. It is amazing how ungrateful the people you continually help become. That’s why I always try to keep in check my impulses on generosity. It is not because I’m very greedy or unwilling to share. I already do my little bit of helping here and there, and just might increase a little bit more if I had more to give. I believe that helping too much is not good either. Aside from taking your constant help for granted, there are lessons that the person you are helping might miss if they don't go through their struggle.
I am reminded of that story when someone, out of kindness, “helped” a new-born butterfly break out of its cocoon by slicing it open. The butterfly came out with a swollen body and shriveled wings. It was never able to fly. It is the struggle out of the cocoon that actually helps it to strengthen its body and allows it to spread its wings and fly. The same goes for us. I believe there’s a valuable lesson wrapped in every hardship that we go through. It’s up to us to either be bitter about it or to meet it head-on and learn as much as we can from it. If someone takes it away, we will never learn the lesson. Trials enrich our souls far better than money can enrich us financially. Nothing hones character more than adversity.
So we would do good to be wise in how we offer “help”. Yes, it's nice to get the credit and the accolade of being known as helpful and generous. I think it can become selfish because what we sometimes do is not really helping, just enabling. Enabling in a way that people remain in their stunted state, while we glory and pat ourselves in the back for being a kind and magnanimous human being.
I think God, in His infinite wisdom, has not allowed me to win the lottery. Well, it doesn’t help that I don’t really buy tickets! But if I ever do, people in really dire straits or in life and death situations will probably get help... as anonymously as I possibly could give it. That way they can put their faith in God and how He works through people, not in people or money. I don't think I will let anyone around me ever know of my windfall, save for Hubby. I think it's just much better that way, don't you think?
Sunday, August 07, 2005
A Tokaya in Boston
A couple of weeks ago, I went to dinner with someone I had met through this blog. She is a namesake of mine, Filipino, a University of the Philippines alumnus, and lives in Boston, as well. With those similarities, how can we not attempt to meet in person, right? It started out when she left comments here. We started corresponding by email semi-regularly after that. I say semi-regularly because the woman has a crazy schedule! MIT is surely squeezing every drop they can out of her before they let her go.
The first time I met her was when she came to watch the show I did a few months back. We were able to chat a bit, but there were just too many people milling about to even start a real conversation. This time, we really got to sit down and probe minds. I found that we were similar in many, many ways, except in one thing. She definitely has more brains than me! She is working on her thesis, and will soon be graduating with a PhD in Chemistry from MIT. She explained to me what she does, it just went completely over my head though. :)
After a very interesting and entertaining dinner, we went around the shops in Faneuil Hall, just to do what women love to do together, chat and browse the sales. It was nice to be able to walk around with a fellow pinay, speaking Tagalog, and sharing that ridiculous pinoy sense of humor. It's just too bad that she's moving away to Indiana after her graduation. But these days, the internet can help maintain friendships that would otherwise be lost if we depended on what we now consider archaic modes of communication, the phone (those phone bills!) and snail mail. That's how I have kept in touch with all my family and friends back home, and it's also how I have met a few wonderful people such as this Tokaya of mine. The internet is an amazing thing, isn't it?
The first time I met her was when she came to watch the show I did a few months back. We were able to chat a bit, but there were just too many people milling about to even start a real conversation. This time, we really got to sit down and probe minds. I found that we were similar in many, many ways, except in one thing. She definitely has more brains than me! She is working on her thesis, and will soon be graduating with a PhD in Chemistry from MIT. She explained to me what she does, it just went completely over my head though. :)
After a very interesting and entertaining dinner, we went around the shops in Faneuil Hall, just to do what women love to do together, chat and browse the sales. It was nice to be able to walk around with a fellow pinay, speaking Tagalog, and sharing that ridiculous pinoy sense of humor. It's just too bad that she's moving away to Indiana after her graduation. But these days, the internet can help maintain friendships that would otherwise be lost if we depended on what we now consider archaic modes of communication, the phone (those phone bills!) and snail mail. That's how I have kept in touch with all my family and friends back home, and it's also how I have met a few wonderful people such as this Tokaya of mine. The internet is an amazing thing, isn't it?
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